To Tie the Knot or Not: The LGBT Community Debates

In Daniel’s Husband, the issue of gay marriage is an important theme, and a divisive issue for partners Daniel and Mitchell, who have different views on the topic. In the aftermath of the legalization gay marriage across all 50 states, many gay and lesbian couples face pressures to marry. So what are people’s reasons for tying the knot… Or not?

Daniel's Husband at Primary Stages

Ryan Spahn and Matthew Montelongo in the Primary Stages production of Daniel’s Husband. Photo by James Leynse. 


PRO: They want to be accepted.

“Couples as well as individuals in the LGBT community will seem less “different” from heterosexual lifestyle, so straight couples and individuals will be more inclined to accept homosexual couples into their communities.”

CON: They don’t want to be involved in a previously discriminatory institution.

“I didn’t want to be a part of any club that wouldn’t have me as a member.”

PRO: It could decrease teen suicide rates.

“We need to explain to younger generations that being different is not a social disability, so that they will never feel the need to take their own lives because they are gay.”

CON: They want to remain unique.

“We’ve got marriage, it’s called a civil partnership and I rejoice in the fact that people like me who are different from straight people can do something they can’t. I relish that.”

PRO: They want to adopt children.

“Many agencies will only release children to “married” couples, therefore rejecting stable, loving, homosexual parents.”

CON: They can gain all the benefits elsewhere.

“The beauty of a civil union or domestic partnership is that it can offer both straight and gay couples the benefits that traditionally married couples receive without having to actually get married, an act that some may find ‘patriarchal’ and ‘anachronistic.’”

PRO: They want hospital visitation and medical rights.

“Legalizing gay marriage will allow gay couples hospital visitation rights and respect the validity of their marriage by letting them make medical decisions on behalf of their spouses.”

CON: They fear it will end poorly.

“Legba Carrefour… calls it a “destructive way of life” that produces broken families.”

PRO: They do it… because they can!

“Gay people who are in favor of same-sex marriage believe anything short of marriage is not equality.”

CON: They don’t feel it will change anything.

“We love each other and have lived together for 30 years,” he said. “Why do we need to get married?”


The Primary Stages production of Daniel’s Husband runs until April 28, 2017 at the Cherry Lane Theatre. For tickets and more information, visit our website.


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